He tried to blame not having a condom on the economy.
i think of them as a grilled chicken salad and a fried chicken biscuit. obviously Amy is better for me, but when i'm eating her all i can think about is how much better the blonde must taste.
She liked every single Facebook status in her newsfeed and then made her status 'I LIKE U GUYS'
I'm pretty sure blacking out is a coping mechanism.
I just bought $54 in Easter crap to try and blend in the pregnancy test... And FYI, it totally worked.
I've blown him while he hit my bong, I've blown him while he played video games and now I'm looking for a new challenge. Don't even try suggesting a blumpkin.
So who was trying to make it rain last night in the bathroom? There are pieces of dollar bill everywhere
I have a rage boner right now. An actual erection brought on by the amount of sheer hatred I have towards nationwide.
damnit. I just found my cousin on tinder.
DOUBLE NIPPLE PIERCINGS ARE HORRIFYING
Shit on my own feet while puking from my hangover. Is this what 33 is supposed to be like?
I am watching xfiles and eating microwaved cookiedough, and I see nothing wrong with it.
I made out with him in the club and he endorsed me on Linkedin. My networking skills are off the charts.
I've come to the conclusion that my issue is I'm not fucking a guy with a headboard
Ever find a porn video so groundbreaking you mentally cancel all your Dick Appointments for the week?
Randomize
