The world needs more lipstick lesbians, if anything.
I just fell for a fake 50 dollar bill in a urinal. Fuck pittsburgh
the girl next to me in class is drinking a margarita out of a slurpee cup. i know your going to ask how i know its a margarita and the answer is i can smell the tequila. i never want to leave this place
It's too hard to jack off and hold an ipad at the same time
Oh well shit happens. This is my not worried face. This is also my still decently drunk face.
Quite frankly, I consider the fact that I'm NOT pregnant one of my greatest achievements and I'd like to chronicle that ongoing success. I'm going to post pictures of me at "0 weeks" once a week.
It's like god touched my soul and said 'you will be great in bed'
If we accept the love we think we deserve do we also accept the sex we think we deserve?
'go have sex with her' ddoes not count as wingman
Just seen a chubby version of you. Nearly kidnapped her. Perfect woman
I woke up to pizza pinned to my wall. So that's that.
I'm scrolling through our convo thread and all we talk about is pizza, alcohol & dick with the occasional "I miss you" thrown in.
Do not tell me I cant do drunk math ever again, AND I made a creative way of telling him I want him to fuck me.
I just chased my birth control with Smirnoff. Shit's about to go down.
Bad part of last night: I puked in my hair. Good part of last night: I assembled a posse.
You kept pulling me aside saying "look what I found"
Randomize
