you can't get genital warts from dogs can you?
I have a pussy blister if you wanna poke at it with a needle tomorrow...by this text i realize just how strange our relationship is, especially because you're probably excited
I think you mean your blister is filled with pus...atleast i hope
In fact, not a good idea to go into any house alone after a man invites you in from his balcony.
Mission get my tooth back and find a new dick to ride starts after i sleep for the first time in 2 days.
She ended up puking in the bathroom. But she's a good drunk... i told her to stay in there so i could dance til the club closed. She was still in the stall an hour later.
I had to find out that I peed in the box of baby clothes from my mom, who found out from my grandma. New low.
how are you shocked you fucked her? sure shes hot, but she also washed your beerpong balls in her mouth..... you should probably get tested.
She jumped on a table and took off her shirt and started yelling things that no one understood. For being 3, she has a dead on impression of a drunk party girl.
It's amazing
I want to run hundreds of miles and do a whole semesters worth of homework while flying on a unicorn and throwing endless glitter bombs
they set my background as his mugshot to remind me "having a big penis won't be a valid excuse in a court room."
Hooked up with a straight guy while dressed as a man. I'm unstoppable.
I smoked my last bong as the sun rose. It was magical.
i have nothing going on in my life. unless a toxic love triangle with netflix and jack daniels counts.
Just had someone from Hells Angels snort coke off my tits...so I'm pretty much done with life now. 💀
Bowls and Harry Potter this morning. I guess work isn't so bad after all
Randomize
