True but thats because hes a fetus.
Just hide your weed in your baby brothers shirt. TSA wont check a baby, thats fucked up
Drinking at work by myself... My boss just walked into me copying my face on the copy machine..
So add panera bread to the places i love to eat that i am potentially banned from.
once you have herpes you dont really care what goes in your mouth anymore.
It would be like bopping for an apple with my penis but never winning an actual prize. The only thing I would get from it would be the joy from taking part but then regretting it forever more
I know this is random but to this day I regret not having sex with you on that atv on the top of that mountain underneath the American flag.
Last time i was there we saw the window of the pizza place we were at get busted, we were pulled out of a taxi to be questioned by the cops, and we peed outside a waffle house. I'm in.
Your niece just basically announced she's a whore on FB so you should feel pretty good about officiating that wedding next month.
She kept calling herself DJ McDonalds and said she wanted to make some Egg McMusic.
I need to stop acting like a drunk bitch. People are going to get the right idea about me...
She was yelling at the tater tots, "In five minutes, you're going in my mouth!"
Honestly I volunteered because the email made it sound like it was a once in a lifetime opportunity to be a sexual spy kid.
He made me spaghetti, gave me wine and I fucked him on the floor, Is that a fair trade of services to you?
The sex was so good we high-fived after.
Randomize
