we had that weird still in bed morning after conversation. Her dad is the vp of my company.
He said he wants to make an itinerary for the sex we'll have when I come home.
Already puke and ralleyd and dressed like a bear.
some fat dude with wolverine facial hair just walked out of your room with a snuggie. explanation needed.
Dude, I had to stop mid fuck. Her cat was swatting at my balls as I did her from behind. I couldve lost something.
I think they're German
Just say lederhosen and see what happens
I was basically shocked at how calmly you accepted my violently shoving a french fry in your mouth.
Trial is expected to last a fucking week if I get chosen.
To be fair, you are the kind of person I want to be on the jury when I inevitably end up in front of one.
He's under the table sobbing because he doesn't live in a taco if you ever get him this high again I will stab you
"Just cut me in half. Then take half of me home. And leave the other half here. Cuz I can't see."
why do all the dudes in this porno look like billy ray cyrus
I just ironed my gstring.. this is please fuck my brains out on a whole new level.
Bra is off & I'm snuggled in a pizza. Adulting is good.
I once went to target high on hydrocodone. I assure you, they can handle unrespectable.
Thank you for stopping me from getting a butt tattoo. That was a good call.
Randomize
