The "puke-towel" started to grow something...
They woke me up at 6am and made me drink a bottle pf champagne yelling "champagne breakfast!"
what's not responsible about a pool full of beer?
When that rick ross song came on he started ripping up dollar bills and pouring out drinks on the floor. I'm all for ignorance but it was a little excessive for a wedding
Woke up with two cats staring at me. One covered in puke thats giving me a look that says it might be my fault. Where am I? Come get me.
I just feel like a little gay dolphin in a massive sea
Sharing a bathroom with a guy sucks. I always have to set an alarm for the middle of the night just so I can take a dump. Poop text btw
This is just what we do. We meet guys, go back to their place, smoke all their weed & go home to compete in out own version of Cupcake Wars.
My ex was there, the 2 girls I'm seeing showed up and I had a pocket full of VIP passes 2 the strip club. Had all the makings of an epic night but I fell asleep at the bar.
Dropping acid was like seeing the whole world as a blank canvas to imagine anything I wanted.
And apparently all you wanted was to watch the sun explode and me take 60,000 dicks to the face.
I just stole some rubbers from the girl I stayed with last night so I can use them on a different girl today..
I am debating about my sub. I am not quite sure I can be the dom he needs.
He's like a fucking cake pop, the greatest thing in the world while it lasts, but it never lasts for long enough
We're sitting in the bathtub, eating pizza, doing shots of vvodka and comparing nipples. I havfe never been so comfortable in my life.
Only you would consider your best friend fucking your boyfriend to be a sign of everlasting friendship
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