i cant wait for all this BS that is happening with Tiger to happen to Tebow
I woke up pulling sunflower seeds out of my vagina. That kind of night.
Some ambulance just rolled up to this bar and this girl just hops out of the back and walks inside
He made fire alarm noises before throwing up all over the street.
I'm ultimately at thr Shariton to drink and ppssibly puke on fancy shit. Thats my story and Im sticking to it.
So the chick throws up over the rail from the 15th floor at the sky bar and I knew I would take her back to my hotel.
I feel like on the last day of finals we should run around campus dressed like Moses screaming "LET MY PEOPLE GO!!!!"
I'll start the recruiting
Don't worry, I'm sure your thrusting skills are on point.
this makes me concerned. not enough to actually do anything about it, but yeah.
I gave him blue balls & ate the last slice of pie so the chances of a second date are slim...
It was a strange night. I made out with his college roommate and said "do you care?" beforehand.
congratulations on joining the accidental bisexual club
Why is there a mildly painful bruise on my back?
You slipped off the sink last night.
Why was I on the sink......?
;)
Have u seen my vagina and my gorilla costume? Im in need of it.
The dog peed on the neighbors baby Jesus. No wonder she thinks we're the devil.
Randomize
