at a party and just made O-H-I-O out of dicks and vajayjays...i hope someone took a pic i was too busy (; GO BUCKS!!!
am i the only one who has tried sucking their own cock????
I have on cowboy boots and a ten gallon hat. I'd say I'm a little past tipsy
She told me to "stuff her hole like a build-a-bear". I was so drunk I didn't even think that was weird.
part of it is the fact that im problem drinking, and the other part is my OCD wont let me leave the bottle half-empty.
God, for the last time, no I did not break my nose doing a keg-stand just for a nose job.
This coming from the girl who broke up with a guy because she found out he played the tuba in middle school.
well, the two that sent pics I've already been with, so at least its not just BAM HERE'S MY PENIS IN YOUR INBOX ENJOY THOSE MEGAPIXELS
I give you full permission to seriously injure me the next time I think it's a good idea to face a bottle of vodka
It felt as if we were fucking on a sea of baby feet and morgan freemans face hair
I'm getting drunk by myself again. But I'm not shotgunning any of them. That's self-restraint, right?
Nothing says happy valentines day like waking up to a naked man you hooked up with taking a walk of shame
Apparently "Do you want me to ruin your day now or later?" is not a good way to tell someone you're pregnant and it's theirs.
Is offering to blow your HR rep considered an ethics violation?
The guy I made out with the other night fed me chipotle favored funions and I thought it was true love when I was drunk.
Randomize
