You were asking people if they could pee on you while you shotgunned beers
I don't know if the fire truck was perfect timing or if she actually burned something down.
for me the strap perfect is like a chastity belt
I was really disturbed by what initially appeared to be a dismembered head sitting beside you. Then I realized you were laying on her body.
They better compete for your attention. Dual to the fuck
I woke up in her bed, she woke up in mine. Apparently there was a miscommunication after the 8th jager bomb.
You were laying in bed whispering and crying to the half eaten burrito saying "why am I shitting so much" and "what did I do to deserve this"
Dude, sorry for live texting you my binge drinking. If you'd like me to do the same for my hangover, I can share that I just had to sit down while q-tipping my ears.
I'm glad I get the same reaction from you for cookies and for my naked body
As long as I don't spend the half the week passed out/fucked up on Klonopin and no one dies, this will be the best week I've had all semester.
I woke up with my earring stuck inbetween my tits. Somehow you fucked my earring out and my boobs saved it. I'm pretty impressed with both of us right now.
She says the reason I don't talk to her is because I'm "emotionally lazy" what ever that means
I was the only one in group sessions to bring up sex as a stress reliever. Some of those people were awfully judgy despite the fact we were all in a psych ward.
This night could easily degenerate into a drunken haze of strippers and gambling, but I need a support network.
I am far too sober to understand you right now. sorry.
Randomize
