Haha no. But I cannot hook up with you anymore. Especially when you group text people.
I had to puke in a pizza box on the drive home. People saw.
There are only two things that should be in vaginas... penises and vegetables
Ran into him today. He apologized via facebook. sometimes I hate our generation
Joey just asked me if I ever got anything stuck in my vag.
was it embarrassing when you had to say yes?
I just found out me and my parents buy from the same drug dealer.
you should get a family discount.
It's not weird mascara. I just have puke crusted on my eyelashes.
They're doing a Bong-A-Thon for 4/20. I don't care if you quit. You are coming out of your weed retirement for this.
Last thing I remember was wondering why there was a mirror on the wall behind the urinal and then realizing I was pissing in the sink.
Quote of the night award goes to my father "I like wearing my swim trunks around the house because they are cooler and more blousy for my balls". Yay dad
Would it be inappropriate to trade Christmas cookies for sex?
Last thing I remember is whiskey shots. My roommate tells me we were there 15min before I decided to run home naked. And we live across from a police station.
I feel like asking for a towel for after I puke before I puke to be more respectful than jus going outside to puke and coming back inside covered in sweat and tears.
He had the same tone in his voice and look in his eyes that he gets when he says UFOs aren't real.
Im going for myspace 2006 goth bitch. Your worst nightmare
Randomize