id tell you what to do, but my morals dont exactly scream, "Listen to this guy!"
I'm to the point in my high that every song eventually turns into Lady Gaga
She is the perfect woman. She cooks, gives good head and doesn't care that I have a small penis.
I drunk madeout with my mom last night. it's guna be an awkward breakfast.
yeah they are definitely having sex in that car. joe just yelled through the window telling them to do the "titanic hand print thing"
I'm being an old woman and getting trashed in a night gown in public...of course it's going to be fun
I never knew so many sexual things could be done while wearing footie pajamas
threw up in the kitchen showroom. home depot employee of the month.
Masturbating on the clock at work is my specialty.
Dude. You stood in a corner laughing your ass off while folding clothes, facing the wall. Yes, they were weed brownies..
Seriously I am not buying you condoms anymore. You're 22, if you aren't woman enough to buy them yourself then you don't deserve orgasms. Grow some tits.
I just masturbated while watching Say Yes to the Dress
This is what my life has come to
I DO have hobbies! I drink. I drink more. I catfish men on Grindr with photos of guys who are less attractive than me. I listen to Lovecraftian podcasts. I'm very well-rounded.
I wish period tracker had a "on this day" also so i can see who i was with this day last year.
yeah i'm making him "thanks for letting me befriend your toilet" cookies. wanna help? i'm sure you'll be making new friends too.
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