he came faster then a bring it on movie goes to dvd
Then you got really excited when I upgraded you from puke bowl to puke bucket.
He is drunkenly eating my teddy grahms and making little growling noises as he bites the head off of each one.
she was most def 27.5% uglier than a troll, but the sex was great
mom asked me why i'm never sober at family events, i told her i learned it from her.
i regret nothing . he quoted dr. suess . he deserved that bj .
In retrospect, getting to second base BEFORE anal wouldve been a good idea
I don't want to smoke with her when she's on adderall. She carved her pumpkin for four hours & didn't say a word.
During your work shift I was either: a) stoned. b) high. c)stoned. or d) high.
Went home with a male stripper who looked like Justin Timberlake.. I started singing cry me a river mid sex. When he sang along I fell in love
we fucked and then he hand fed me a hot pocket
My day so far: morning after pill and pancakes. Living the dream.
I'm gonna give the church their tithe, and the rest is a down payment on boobs.
Im going to seductively wisper "that butters my biscuit" in your ear
im mourning your vaginas lack of frictional upkeep
Randomize
