I'm pounding a vodka drink as we speak to make her interesting
Neighbors just bought a new bong. Got high with them and we decided to name it "Gary colemans sweet sugarlumps" these guys are hilarious
I made her cum... she sounded like Ray Romano
So would it be tacky to offer my services as a future attorney as an engagement gift for her?
I blew him while watching the aristocats. There were singing cats in the background. I think he he hummed along at one point.
Just woke up in his bed wearing only his shoes. I don't know how to gently say hey dude get the fuck up and take me home....regardless these are some nice shoes.
Less than a month to graduation and I'm still blacking out on the reg tonguing down the closest breathing organism preferably with a penis but I'm flexible, and still havent figured out how to be functional on Fridays. WHY don't they teach us valuable shit at this institution!?
Just wanted to say a big ole FUCK YOU for coming out to mom the day before I have to drive with her for 6 hours. Ass hat.
Listen I just pulled white girl hair out of my underwear. This has got to stop. I was wearing pants all night.
Had a dream I cut my own dick off. That's it I gotta see a doctor...
Umm
Exactly.
Discovery: there is a folder in my pictures labeled "Your Name and cats"
After sending me a dick pic, he asked, "yay or nay?"
Well I'm a full service fuck buddy so lemme know if I can get you food or water or anything
That guy u hooked me up with kept calling me james while were doing it...
If you need me I'll be in the hospital involving super glue and fake eyelashes.
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