I can't make any promises. I've tried my best to stay celibate. But if a guys on top of me, Im gonna tell him to stick it in.
we couldnt find her phone in the morning so i called it and found it under the bed. my name came up as 'regret'
He's the biggest piece of shit to ever exist. He's not even wearing shoes.
I just figured I'd let u know that you bought a yacht on ebay last night
Fell into a man hole last night. I've been bleeding since 11pm. Got kicked out of the bar for being bloody.
Nothing like buying a handle and a 36 pack with a baby strapped on.
Also while I am being the bigger person I plan on bringing over something strong smelling and/or alcoholic to torture the poor hungover bastard
ive penciled you in for a day of excessive drinking
Speaking of gay, some dude in a life vest just goes, we should pull our dicks out! To larry. Were leaving now. I saw penis
Some kid just popped open a giant PBR and walked into his final...
Oh yeah I remember when I first saw Kyler's balls. If there's anything high school swim prepared me for, it's the amount of testicles I would see here
Haha i really think theres no better way to tell a paramedic sorry for breaking your nose than a beautiful and healthy edible arrangement...
i mean ive seen your left buttcheek how much more bro can this get
I promised to leave my panties on but I didn't promise to not have sex
The only food I have to eat is weed gummies and magic mushrooms... This is peak 34
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