I had a good time, probably would have a bigger headache today if you were in town.
You have more facebook pictures than most towns have people.
Counseling BFF to break up with her BF. We will get that 3-way
dude, I feel like I need to get my gf's roommate a gift. something that says, sorry you walked in on me getting blown. suggestions?
There was a dismembered bleeding penis in my dream last night. That's some serious Freudian shit.
this cock blocking thing really has to end bro...its one thing to tell jen i live with my mom.. its another to cut the brakes on my car..
They are fixing my bike for free, trying to smoke me out, and their kids keep hugging me.
I seriously think I got run over last night.. My sides are bruised and I got a ride home in the limo from the office.
That and I was watching this life alert commercial and I'm pretty sure my liver turned up the volume for more information
I found my spirit animal in the shower. It's a sloth/bear that lives in my chest.
just remember the most important rule of taking psychedelics: monsters can't get through blankets
I just wrote a love letter to my weed and texted it to my cousin. I can't say it any differently. It happened.
I don't want to go back to the suburbs. Being drunk in public isn't ok and theres too many children. Don't make me.
Talked to the dude for a hour . I now know where he lives, his occupation, his goals, his dreams and what his dick looks like.
All I remember is pissing by the garage and the next thing I know I'm on fire
Randomize
