come over anyways, right now, right this second
it can be a super quick quicky, then you can go back to studying
wow, that sounds SO fun, please stop enticing me with premature ejaculation
hahaha Yeah oh well, she wrote on my facebook wall, That's almost like a digital hand job
You named all of the cocktail shrimps and then tackled a guy for "eating Henry"
there's something wrong with the internet when a search for "barney the dinosaur violence" comes up with nothing
So somehow I got from NYC to a suburban town in the middle of Jersey. At 4am. Thank god there are trains that can rectify my mistakes...
She's the hottest girl I've ever seen before and didn't lose her virginity until she was 19. As men, I take it as failure on our part that hot 19 year old virgins still exist.
At what point did you think the cops were actually coming to hang out with us
You cant hold me accountable for my actions when im high.
screw it, I'll just be a stripper until next August when then are looking for suitable teachers to teach the future of America. it's like a feel good movie just a little out of order and im a dude.
When's a good time to tell your boyfriend you've slept with his ex girlfriend?
Please don't smoke the bong in the bathroom while you shit. It is not a shitting bong.
First time at a gay bar. I found a surrogate AND sperm donor! The surrogate is straight, so it evens out.
How about we just fuck in random places all around campus, and skip the boring relationship part?
Just made a bong out of a pineapple. So yes.. And champagne is about to be popped
My Sexting was not on an AP level
Yeah, we got drunk and stole road signs.
Randomize
