Well I thought that next 8 ball would either kill us or turn us into Gods
He looks like the kind of guy that still collects pokemon cards
apparently there was a flour fight and couch sex...
His wife found out about our affair the same day he got fired for it.
Goddamn you thin people LEAVE FOOD FOR THE BIGGER DRUNKARDS WHO NEED IT
He just walked from his house to mine. Walked in and asked for a hug and then left.. And he's sober.
I feel like he's mythological. Like you just had lunch with the Loch Ness Monster of hotness
I really have to stop having sex with people I sell drugs to...it feels unprofessional
He put those pics of him with those girls on facebook and tagged his wife in them
Tequila 1 marriage 0
This summer has already been like the best summer ever. FREEDOM IS AWESOME. GOD BLESS AMERICA AND GOD BLESS THE SINGLE LIFE.
He said I was really mad at him on Friday. Dude I fell asleep in all my clothes and shoes, with my flashlight on, on my phone... I could have been mad at the wall. It wasn't my classiest day.
Did I put a bunch of spaghetti on you and then eat it off?!?
That you did
She gave me a boner for the first time in 9 years.
We need to know if his feet match his cock.
You went into my bathroom put on my bathrobe.. Said excuse me then went in my front yard and started yelling who ate my whopper..
Randomize