I must say, I don't like the act of throwing up, but the feeling after is quite delightful
you threw up in thedumpster behind red robin
and kept yelling "DIRTY BIRD"
theres no point in washing my sheets anymore. its always going to be a fine layer of booze and semen.
what's for breakfast?
Advil and throwup
This guy legit just tried to LSAT formal logic his way into my pants. Contrapositives and everything.
Just looking for some anal play. An attempting to read atonement. The highbrow/lowbrow divide is striking.
Nope we're in the ER. He lit himself on fire trying to impress another girl with magic tricks.
My younger brother just got high fives from all my guy cousins for fucking my best friend. I hate family gatherings.
Did you put pizza in my boxers last night?
I left you 4 hours ago. Have you been walking around with shit in your pants all day?
How are you getting in?
I know some influential drag queens
Dude respond to my evite. You're either coming to the orgy or not.
Blizzard, Hour 9: I'm 7 beers deep and have finished Ninja Turtles. I am listening to the NYPD and Nassau Fire Dept pipes and drums and writing new drum scores in my head, which I may or may not remember tomorrow
Why is there cereal literally EVERYWHERE?
It didn't follow directions.
Married dude I had an affair with 10yrs ago was at table next to us at dinner last nite. My mom asked him to take a pic of us & then commented how cute he was as they left. Do I tell her he’s got a huge D too?
Is it sad the checkout lady had to inform my mom she can't buy alcohol before 8am?
Randomize
