Its not like he dircectly choose a cheeseburger over sex, it was more like I said seductively "I really appreciate this and I'm going to make it up to you anyway I can" and he replied "i want a bacon cheeseburger"
i guess he just knew i was going to sleep with him either way
All we had was a keg so we played edward nalgene-hands
Too bad my thesis topic isn't "defining a hot mess: a study in drinking, smoking and other bad life decisions."
Then you can skip the embarrassing can I date your ex since you're a lesbian now conversation
He kept coming back from the bar with hotter girls and just left with two...I feel like I just witnessed something amaZing. Like meeting Jesus and finding out he has no morals either
he handed me my panties in front of my date. turns out he wasn't that mad.
Sorry for screaming that you were an apple in spanish at the bar last night, that was the wine talking
We made a water bong out of a wine bottle... Being an architect major finally payed off.
You were air-planing a joint into my mouth while I was crying naked in the bath tub.
Best Friends For Life.
You sucked a guys dick who's name was Chad and that wasn't a sign that it was a bad idea?!
no, you don't understand how much people deal here. All I had to say was "hey lets buy a bag" and he pulled over instantly, then the randoms in the car behind us pulled over and sold us a bag.
I'm having a martini with dinner. A new level of class.
I'm stoned and eating mustard, also a new level of class.
I just know what's gonna happen. I mean. I shaved my legs up to shorts length. But I'm leaving the rest as a sort of makeshift caution tape.
I smoked a joint in the bathtub at 8 am then went back to bed
i may have just googled 'is philly rioting right now'
Randomize
