Yeah I gave the girl a dirty look. And only a three dollar tip.
Yeah, I have to wait a few months then take a sample in, I asked the doctor if the sample could be wiped off my wife's back...i told her he said face only.
I'm so ready for finals. She finally agreed to skypesex me from spain so now i'm up until 4am studying every morning waiting for her to get online
Today as a vday present for myself I am walking in between any couples I see on campus.
Woke up chewing my pillow from a dream where I was scarfing Cajun pasta from TGI Friday's. That's a new level of fat, even for us
Bc when the owner of your local gay bar and a drag king ask you to take them to a rival gay bar 2hrs away at 4 in the morning YOU GO.
I gave you head at the stadium on a Thursday night ESPN game. That damn well better be worth points on the score board!!!
sometimes after I smoke and the high has gone away...the high will come back like three hours later for a brief yet gripping ride.
that's usually when I end up in someone's house, having sex with someone else, while that someone's roommate makes us mozzarella sticks.
He only had napkins in the bathroom... no toilet paper. If I fuck him, am I settling?
Ok, I have three hours. I'm trying to work out two blow jobs and a taco.
Me and a 30 year old man are sitting in my bathtub in swimsuits drinking straight rum from the bottle. Don't tell me how fucked up your Christmas is.
He broke up with me because "we're at different points in our lives" I think it's because he saw a drag queen with their hand halfway down my pants
I enjoy the level of friendship we have achieved until you ask me to determine what may or may not be gentile warts via iphone pic
No one should ever be so high that they forget the food. That's just...its a violation of God and Nature, of the very laws that we live by!
Did she seriously come back inside just to piss on the kitchen floor?
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