I just woke up to a guy kissing me goodbye and leaving for class. I don't know where I am, don't have any clothes on, my underwear are gone, and the shoes I found with my dress aren't mine. He just walked in and gave me my phone. I was on my period. Come get me I will walk to the nearest intersection and wait.
True Life: I puke at bars and try to catch it in my hand...then walk away like it didn't happen
Bank of America texted me 7 times in 12 hours to say my balance was below $50. I kept transfering money back in. Then I texted my bank saying that it was okay, i knew what I was doing.
Is it sad that when she told me he has a small peen I felt like it made us more compatible?
I just dumped out my gym water bottle and filled it with white wine. This is the end.
I'm sick of being broke. I had vicodin and frosting for lunch.
You were fucked up like a footballbat trying to eat gum off your shoe. And that wasn't even the nights lowest point.
Hes trying to fuck me on a bear rug. Not saying no.
Currently playing beer pong versus the girl i lost my virginity to.....and her mom
we were looking for paper towels to wrap his hand and i yanked a drawer out of the cabinet, it was fun so we just kept doing it. things escalated and long story short, he isn't gettin his security deposit back
SHE'S PREGNANT AS SHIT, AND I JUSR PEELED A CLEMENTINE TO CHASE SHOTS WITH!! COULD LIFE GET ANY BETTER!?
i'm just really offended he didn't want to have breakup sex. like that was the only thing i was really looking forward to
I just gave him road head. He came in the Taco Bell drive thru which seems pretty typical for my life.
She told me she loves wine, but hates the mud butt the next day. Dude, way to much info on a second date.
Just walked outside my house; realized I wasn't wearing any pants after about 3 minutes or so.
Drunk, high, hungover?
...I wish I had an excuse.
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