life just isnt the same w/o real world cancun
just threw up nine times in the shower.. solid night last night.
alright so where did all these fingerpaintings on my bedroom wall come from?
dude. you drew those with your dick
Ok I might come if this chair quits being so great...I'm also seeing this bush in the corner turn into a witch
Two grown ass men just come into the bar riding humongous tricyles
Get everyone out of their dorms and watch 3 girls do the walk of shame from my room.
I just got my inseam measured in raffle tickets by a drag queen. Being fondled for charity is awesome.
I don't know where Tiffany is but I just saw her shoes in the bar lost and found
Because at some point last night we decided that shotgunning beers from a paint stick was a good idea
Even though he had a fractured vertebrae, the sex was still phenomenal. Better than normal actually. I hope the vertabrae never heals.
My vag hurts but I feel vindicated
That is an interesting emotion combo
There's no time frame.
For drinking wine out of the bottle and taking nyquil at 9 AM? There probably should be.
I had to fake it. He was punching my vagina like it owed him money and enough was enough.
Dude, I'm at a wedding and there's a mashed potato bar and bacon strip appetizers. I'm getting all emotional.
I have to stay away from bourbon. Despite what it keeps telling me, it is NOT my friend.
Randomize
