We fucked standing up with my right leg over his shoulder. Thank you mom and dad for having once enrolled me in gymnastics. It has finally paid off
They were fighting, but then they bumped into the bong and it shattered. After that they just hugged and cried.
You kept tellin the cashier that this order was "To Go" over and over...even tho we were in the drive-thru
I'm already mentally preparing myself for the fact that I'll probably be sleeping next to a toilet.
I can't wait for round whatever # we're on tonight.
nothing can ever be as bad as the night i blacked out, updated my fb status to i need a pity fuck and then passed out for 13 hours.
Also, what is a socially acceptable way to introduce a crossbow in public?
if all that ever happens for the rest of forever is drinking wine and eating popcorn, ill be okay
I am in a hotel room with 10 people. John is in bed eating an industrial sized pan of mashed potatoes. I think a non insignificant number of people saw my nipples.
Officially crunch time. It's my last year of grad school and I've yet to get blown in a school library. The parking garage was less than a block away though.
The only way he could ever pleasure me is if he lit himself on fire and let me watch
If a treadmill opens up I'll run next to him and then fall off so he has to give me mouth to mouth
It was like the icing on a beautiful fuck boy cake.
I just watched will sing pure imagination from willy wonka and then blow a banana
And on the 323rd day without sex, God finally said let there be light...or love?
Randomize
