I've been emailing with a woman. I don't think she's into me, but we've become sorta email buddies. I'm hoping to meet her because on her profile she states she's into 'fisting.' Frankly the thought kinda freaks me out but I'm dying to see what kind of woman is 1) into that and 2) admits it upfront.
a hangover this bad deserves a feeding tube
I just realized that two weekends in a row we ended up in a bathroom with two different boys asking us for a threesome. does this happen to everyone?
He kept moaning America instead of Erica while fucking me.
he found cum stains on my sheets and all i could blurt out was "better on the sheets than in me"
Just talked a homeless guy out of suicide. Was rewarded with a garbage bag full of mountain dew bottles and zannies. Im such a good person
Spending 4 hours in the emergency room today tells me that your birthday party was a success.
How bad would it be if I wore out the dress we got peed on in. You're the only one who knows.
I smoked out of two pipes at the same time while my friends wielded the lighters last night. It felt like I graduated to the next level of stoner.
you can't tell me not to come to work cause roads are bad then ask me an hour later to come in and expect me to be sober
The porch is breathing.
STAY OUT OF MY SHROOMS YOU CUNT
I wish you looked at me the way you looked at my brothers penis
Did you poop on the roof?
WTH?
Is that a no?
It involves me, my best friend, and a stripper and her mother.
So, I almost went hone with a French guy and a drag queen. Together. Then I became sober enough to realize, that's not my style.
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