gavin joseph was born around 1 oclock 9lbs 12oz... over 21 inches long
Thats what she said
No, when he said that he wished he had my eyebrows, THATS when I knew he was gay.
I just threw up in a patch of wild flowers on the side of the road. I never knew rock bottom was so beautiful.
She said my dick tasted like a junior mint. Ive decided im using this soap the rest of my life
I made out with Jen. We were naked. I'm still gay. Forever
So. Much. Sex. I feel like i ran a marathon then someone kicked me in the vagina. Soo worth it
Well who could blame her. I would run away from me if I could.
The joke is on me because whale penis is forever in my search history.
Worth it.
I just want to braid flowers into his hair and steal all of his pills.
Today was brought to you by the letter B for beer and bourbon and the number fuck you I'm meant to be studying not hungover
he's 22 and listens to dad music. if i hear one more modest mouse song i'll never blow him again
Socially acceptable to sleep in a booth in the library? Its not finals but I dunno if I can make it back to south. Too drunk.
Everyone in Columbus is two degrees of separation from my vagina.
So, I just ordered a breathalyzer for this weekend. I figured if I'm getting shitfaced, I should at least be scientific about it.
I threw up soo much that I started crying. Then his grandma randomly came in and started rubbing my back...
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