there should be a rule- if you jizz on it, you wash it
"tonights gonna be a goodnight" was blasting at the club while i was screaming "NO ITS NOT" and crying. How do you think it went?
I saw a chick at 8 am this morning walking back to my dorm wearing wings... I'm kind of jealous.
this kid at 40 friday greeted another kid by saying "heeey farmville neighbor"
dude.
yep. needless to say i didn't meet anyone and spent yet another friday night masturbating.
I farted on Jack's balls last night. He got pissed and walked away cause he knew it was on purpose. I couldn't hold it in anymore.
We should have parties more often. I ended up with 90 beers and someone cleaned my toilet.
Slugs feel like vagina... thought you would want to know
Passing out during sex is actually quite pleasant. its like being rocked to sleep with a penis
it's ok. you also told me I can feel free to vomit on your blow dryer sometime.
No she had like 2 shots and started ironing her clothes and whispering random shit in my ear
I need you to help me convince Steph that she will like Tequila if she would chase it with A-1
drunk freshman in the bathroom puking keeps saying "i'm a peasant" over and over
You came over, called every girl Comrade Heather, and then declared that you were an Eagle, and we were your young.
So all in all, a good night.
I just ordered 30 klonopins from India that could probably be anything from Viagra to Midol. You need to find another friend to get advice from right now
So, Kevin dropping me off at urgent care. Seems my tampon slipped out of reach. Even after he tried to get it out with some kitchen tongs.
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