I think she just tried to waterboard me with her vagina.
Myspace is for pedophiles and tweakers in the 818 trying to hook up. I always forget theres music there too
dont get mad but guess who just got banned for life from dodger stadium
You know who really doesn't like surpise in-your-face air guitar solos? Strangers.
I'm gagging in the liquor aisle just thinking about how much alcohol I'll be drinking this weekend.
He did not want a thank you for helping me move in bj. I don't know how to thank him now.
I have glow sticks stuck to my boobs and a missed call from the 911. I'd say last night was a success.
he's speaking broken english and calling me isaac.. this is not the australian i ordered for a one nighter
She had her insurance card taped to her arm because it was the only thing she "couldn't take off and lose"
I took 36 pictures of my lava lamp. your weed wins.
Nope. Turns put my desperate group message for sex didn't work out.
Well you sent it to two guys who were roommates.
They could have rock paper scissored for it. My vagina = the prize.
I just googled "can they trace a vibrator back to you" so that' s how my life it going.
I was in the rappers prayer circle. Then they're blunt circle
I took it as a sign from the lord above that she wanted me to creep on these men.
You couldn’t remember the word hand jibber. Instead, your drunk ass offered the bartenders “unlimited hand fritters” if they wouldn’t cut you off.
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