She says ass holes are for stuffing, the verb, not stuffing, the noun.
It was kinda bitchy last night when i brought up my pregnancy scare and you said "shotty playing with it"
if my spotter knew I was listening to the Wicked soundtrack on my iPod, I wouldn't even be mad if he dropped the barbell on my throat
she definitely blew him on the riverbank, some lady floated past and said "have some pride honey", amazingly awkward
We had to introduce ourselves in ethics class. This guy stood up said I'm mark, I love sluts and Jack. Then just sat back down. Hero status.
Because it is about to snow, I sent him for Diet Coke and cigarettes. It's the gay version of milk and bread.
Consider it an appointment to improve my blow job capabilities.
Now I'm heckling that my belch is more exciting than their fireworks and I peed down the driveway.
well he got me up crazy early but i got pizza for breakfast and an electric blanket to sleep with sooo he passed the one night stand test.
He followed me on twitter after I posted a drunk screen shot of a tweet. It's like he gave me permission to stalk him on a whole different level.
dude he's still passed out in my bathtub. and his dick is half way in a 40 bottle... i really hope he was just trying to piss in it
Happy Birhtday!
Dad, it's 3am and it's not my birthday... wherever you are, go home
She drunkenly dropped her ranch for her pizza. She tried to clean it up with her hands off the street then realized it didn't work and started licking her fingers.
I've had more orgasms than showers this week.
You know how last week before we left I was drinking outta that blue cup and I left it sitting across the road. Well, it hadn't moved and my family just found it, brought it inside and cleaned it. I think this cup is my soulmate.
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