you remind me of a slightly lless slutty bristol palin
and you remind me of a slightly less retarded levi johnston
i was so blacked out at my family party.. my mom gave markers to all my little cousins. i was tagged by 5 year olds.
You tired to make Beefaroni in the Mr. Coffee machine.
At what point last night did I start ordering doubles?
Right after we had the just friends talk..
I told you it's awful. It looks like he was eating honey at a barbershop and tripped.
Hairspray is covering 85% of my body. Help.
Wait until you see the roof.
We went out. i got lost. dunno where they were. they slept in the car. i slept in an outdoor shower. i dont know anything else.
She just told me she's too full for a reach-around. Sad.
We are stranded. Come find us. Bring an egg
It feels like you stuck your dick in a fire and then branded the inside of me.
Hey, so, you were my "one phone call" last night... Thanks for not picking up. See, this is why I never call you.
well when I said that I would ride his face until he ran out of oxygen, that's when I knew I shouldn't be around beautiful people anymore.
In case you were wondering I realized something last night, Rick James was correct. Cocaine is a hell of a drug.
I just told my mormon professor that I was late because I was getting a STD test... good start to the day.
Yeah, we got drunk and stole road signs.
Randomize
