Are you guys doing anything tonight?
Krysta
This just in: I met a girl who does the phone sex phone lines, and shes' 5'4" 320. I'll never get a hardon again through a phone.
Robbie told me you spent 10 mins discussing the curl in his hair and that you said "with that curl in your hair, you'll go far"
How was your weekend?
The sex was so good. It hurts to exist.
My god. His mom just smacked my ass. Does this mean I'm accepted??
He followed me on twitter after I posted a drunk screen shot of a tweet. It's like he gave me permission to stalk him on a whole different level.
if elf comes on TV one more time i swear to god i will smash my brains out with this fruitcake
He told me I was "too flexible." Excuse me?
Being a fine ass woman in a world full of fuckboys is the realest struggle I've ever known.
Not sure when or why this happened but I just stopped giving a shit about everything
My apartment looks like the apocalypse of sobriety.
If you ever tell anyone I offered you boob squeezes for cheetos, I'll kill you
I may or may not have puked near a bear on the side of the road this morning.
I feel like I'm in a astronaut outfit like I'm a spaceman & I'm just floating around cause that's all you do in space is float and I'm floating to be in detail
Houston we have a problem
He told me he would make me come so hard I would throw up. I'm actually horrified that he thinks that's something any person would want
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