Would you object to my putting the bidet video on my Facebook page? It;s awesome.
try this...when you orgasm scream his address including city state and zip...
BEES IN MY FUCKING PANTS. HELP.
I'm so hungover even the car commercials make me nauseas
I have "you made mistakes last night" written alllll over me.
Went to the career fair today..I handed out many resumes to find out later that they say I have a bachelor o farts degree...Top that.
I wish i could be on x for the rest of my life.
We made a bong out of a plastic football. I can honestly say we make a good team.
The amount of alcohol I'm going to consume on my birthday is directly proportional to the amount of shit I've had to put up with this past year. Which is a lot.
He let him chew on his fu man chew. The man has the patience of a saint
I think you'll be amused to know that I achieved the impossible feat of tripping over my own dick
So, I'm about to take my pants off in the Walmart parking lot, when am old lady parks next to me. I'm all the way in the back next to the semis. What the hell?
HE WAS DRESSED LIKE A FISHERMAN AND HE WAS LIKE OH SHIT I THINK I JUST FOUND THE DEADLIEST CATCH i couldnt not go for it my honour compelled me
My goal for the weekend: procure a blowjob using only stern glances, hand gestures, and crudely-drawn stick figures.
I was going to learn how to knit but I got high instead.
Randomize
