If you're really into hairy Serbian chicks, Cleveland has a lot to offer(216): We're going to cougar night, the serbian chicks are the best aged.
Do you have a straightener and are extra lubricated condoms not the norm?
So you refered to him as "monster dick"...not so much
It was some time between the gurgles of her blowing me to us throwing up in the same bucket afterwards that I realized we would be doing this a lot.
You should see the damage i did to the apartment last night. So many broken things and butter sticks stuck to windows.No memorys
you know it takes a lot for me to use utensils conservatively
you're my knight in shining pee-resistant armor
Codeine + Boredom = Sprinting between my front and back door.
I just made a cocktail. Had one shot of vodka left. It looked lonely so I decided to reunite it with its vodka friends in my bloodstream.
Starting the day at 1:44 in the afternoon. With a hot pocket and a mixer. Who knew my life had this kind of possibility.
Quick question: is it impolite to pause sex to put on my knee brace?
I want you to get your positive energy all over me. I want to to look like something from Ghostbusters.
Simple revenge plan: break into his house and steal one shoe of every pair
Crying in Target on a display sofa is normal, right? Asking for a friend.
I slept with six men with different nationalities this week. Who says I'm not a woman of culture?
Dear Andy-the problem is not that I slept with your girlfriend, it's that you didn't know she's a lesbian.
Randomize
