you want to go make fun of the strippers on try out night
i got kicked out last time for laughing
Yeah, you spent an hour in front of the mirror trying to reenact the Sailor Moon theme song.
whatever it's my dick and i'll put it wherever i want
Remember that time we were in the handicap bathroom snorting Molly at the stripclub. That was a defining moment in our friendship
So I've gone into the break room to heat up a styrofoam cup 8 times over the course of 4 hours.. that desperate to see him. Now I have a broken heart AND cancer.
The carpet cleaning people refuse to steam clean human feces. I'll call back later and blame it on the dog not you
I think mounting someone proves who's house this is
Fran... I put my tongue in somebody's gage hole last night.
It was awful. Mid hookup he started reading the titles of the books over my bed, which were about Russian imperial history. He then started asking me questions about the class I was reading the books for. I was like "WE HAVE TIME FOR THAT LATER, PLEASE CONTINUE."
Don't linger or you will get sucked into spending the night. Remember the mission mantra: GET OFF
It's meant to be, Cynthia. You, him, and your developed breasts are meant for each other.
The fact that I am laying in bed on my stomach with an ice pack on my rump is a clear indication that I am no longer in my carefree 20s
I flashed my cleaning lady and don't remember who I went on a date with. I know who I woke up with though, that counts right?
you're welcome to come here, except my beds from ikea so it's more unstable than i am
you stood in front of the mirror for 20 minutes and finally said, "he can hear everything i'm saying inside my head. we need to leave." now try and tell me there is no such thing as too high.
Randomize