i used the pictures of vaginas in your biology book to jack off.
I need to get the stench of sex and broken dreams out of my room
i think you walked me home, then i felt bad for putting you through the trouble so i walked you home...i'm not sure how i got home after that.
I sat on his lap and we shared a beer. I feel like that's an invitation to his dick.
I found what appears to be half an E pill and part of a tooth in my pocket this morning
Aside from the slim chance of pregnancy, I'm gonna call last night a raging success.
Every shot buddy I have I end up blowing. I don't know whether this pattern is good or bad.
I hope they realize that to me "collecting their mail" is synonymous with "fucking in every room in their house, and twice in the party shower."
She asked the woman in the drive through to cover everything she ordered in mayonnaise, including here chilli cheese fries. Didn't happen. Then she started swerving at the car next to us screaming, asking if they had mayonnaise.
No, no. The rest of his everything inspires me to put his dick in my mouth
Yeah i was handcuffed to the bed all night but i actually slept like a baby
That's why you need to have them together. Katie started crying on the couch and she just gave her a tube of crackers and picked up a beer at the same time. She's like a goddess of making things chill
He's gonna do me a solid for doing her a solid. It's like pay it foward. But with sex.
I have to sleep with him. We're too much alike. It's like clash of the titans, except instead of clashing, he's putting it in me.
It was terrible. I am sore from head to toe, neither of us got off, and we were at it for an hour and a half, I faked having a heart episode so we could stop. It worked.
Randomize
