i'm using my hot pot to make jello shots in a muffin tin. i'm never ever graduating.
Also, I had a dream I had a ray gun and woke up holding my dick.
If im still in the bathroom puking when the sirens go off please distract the cops.
Apparently riding the dog like its a small horse is frowned upon in this establishment
I may or may not have just ruined a marriage. But in my defense I got all my drinks for free tonight.
I saw a crackhead in a ballerina outfit riding a bike while waving her hands and one leg in the air. Never seen such talent in my life
it was fucking weird. cops showed up but they appreciated our 3 story bong. and then some girl tried to steal our cheese and butter
I FINALLY HAVE A REASON TO DYE MY PUBES BLUE!!!
I raged so hard that I was so hungover today I threw up out of a car window going 50mph cause my parents didn't pull over quick enough ...sorry to the people behind us
We had sex to beyonce's "drunk in love" and then he order me pizza. It was perf
I kinda got drunk and threw my debit card into a bonfire so I don't have any money at the moment lol.
I threw up a lot of peanut butter last night.
I'm just sitting here drunk and eating peas because my life sucks
You threw up a gallon of vomit. I really have never seen anything like it in my decade of partying.
WE HAVE WINE WHERE ARE YOU GUYS WE ARE BY THE GIANT EAGLE
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