the liability waiver did not state that i couldn't bring my bottle of wine in the bouncy castle. it did Not.
I told her I was team Edward. I haven't gotten laid that easy since I told your sister that I had cancer
the last thing i remember is you screaming lets hunt humans.
my summer class's final was canceled bc it interfered with the world cup. he is giving us all A's on it. I love europe
I puked in the pool and didn't tell them, then they all went swimming. Is it dick to just sit back and enjoy the show?
i love that youre following in my footsteps.. pissing yourself on your birthday is an honor and a privlege
You were air-planing a joint into my mouth while I was crying naked in the bath tub.
Best Friends For Life.
You rolled around on the floor, yelled about being a "half-zombie" and bit that guy on the leg who was hitting on me.
That would be an interesting position... Not entirely certain how that'd work!
Gravity is no match for my libido
I vaguely remember seeing that couple making out in front of that store and i yelled "I ALSO LOVE THE ROCKY MOUNTAIN SOAP COMPANY!"
I really hope you didn't eat the bowl of melted vanilla ice cream I left on the coffee table. Because it is not melted vanilla ice cream.
We took vodka shots. You kept saying it was the key to your heart.
The police report said i was screaming at someone that wasnt there, then the cops told me to call someone sober and i called mike to tell him "They are trying to arrest me for stealing information from the FBI" at that point they took me to jail.
I'm driving to work hungover. I feel like I got hit by a train and then drank that train too.
If he brings home bacon, dont let him leave. Dont screw this one up. this may be our last chance.
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