So its not gay if you have sex with another woman and its academic
so what if I'm having sex with a woman for recreation?
Thats gay
I didn't know that people actually queef. Is this a real thing?
I believe so, yes.
Would you be offended if I asked if it has happened to you?
Down at cameli's and some homeless dude just pulled out a taser. Awesome.
I just drank Colt45 out of a champagne glass. I feel classy.
Colt 45 out of anything is classy.
I'm so used to throwing up its no longer a game of hanging over the toilet. Now it's just 'stand up, aim for the toilet, do my thing' then walk out
test run with donkey pinata disastrous. broken glass and tequila EVERYWHERE
Leaving the phone at home last night was the best decision I ever made.... Though I still managed to text her and now I have 2 phones...
You pulled down your pants, pissed in the recliner, and wiped yourself with my utility bill. I thought it was in the worlds best interest to put you to bed.
I'm sorry, our booty call lines closed at 2 am. If you are receiving this message it is our off hours. Please try again between the hours of 12pm and 2 am to reschedule your booty call. Thank you for your cooperation.
Lesson learnt. Sex toy cleaning spray is not an acceptable substitute to clean your glasses with.
I'm pretty sure male strippers are the last things I need in my life right now.
He whispered "Are you feeling it now Mr. Krabs?" when he was inside me. That is NOT my fetish.
I almost wanna stick a tampon in and sneeze bent over to see if it actually shoots out
Get over here asap there are three naked girls two bottles of whiskey and only one of me
I mean...he danced with his dick still inside of me. What more could a girl ask for?
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