Enough with studying for finals. Time to put that my little pony coloring book to use.
I just spent my lunch hour driving around campus yelling "TRADE LIVES WITH ME!" to all the freshmen moving in
So...AT&T finally added picture messaging for iPhone...bring on the tits!!!
I just saw someone marching around outside wearing only a loincloth, dragging a fuckton of sheet metal. Spring has Sprung.
We turned everything surrounding BP and the oil leak into a "that's what she said" drinking game. We've been drunk for a month
Most eventful shower ever. Jacked off, peed and puked in there.
You see.... Im at the point in my life where pissing in a toilet is a luxury for me
He's like a perfect storm of amazing hair and horrible judgment.
Your drinking has interfered with your drinking. I bet you could get a scholarship to a rehab. Thats pro-level
Also, any YOLOwl-related sex photos will result in you winning ten orgasms, courtesy of myself, as well as sweets and bacon-based dinner. All entrants welcome
You see it tends to piss fathers off when they find their daughter in the arms of a shirtless guy that neither he nor his daughter knows.
I just spent a solid 3 minutes trying to figure out how to send a smell through my phone
But lunch with my dad really just means an hour and a half of him telling me how he's disappointed and how he knows I'm on drugs
If you fuck up my birthday by dying I will kick your fucking corpse.
First aid class means get dry humped by moderately attractive college students during heimlich maneuver training.
Randomize
