apparently when i got back to tyler's i layed face down on the bed and yelled "don't hurt my asshole!"
i just google searched 'can you pop your ovary'
im at that stage where all she has to do is cough or something and it pisses me off
i am devastated. she was DTF and I was about to puke, i told her to wait outside my room for a second. Puked. Passed out woke up, she was gone. Found puke stains on my keyboard that seem to spell out youporn....
Have u Seen that eharmony commercial where the guy goes " I don't know how I could love her anymore, but tomorrow I will'. Yeah that guy should kill himself
I feel like I could be a daytime drinking legend, like they could put that shit on my tombstone and right now your preventing me from reaching my full potential
I said make yourselves at home, not to put a used condom on my ceiling fan.
Thanks for talking me down from peeing on his window last night.
I am now curious as to how you would have aimed.
If there is a ladylike way to throw up in your favorite toilet, I just did it.
I feel as if I need Plan B just being in the same room as them for more than 5 minutes.
Do you hit a new low in life when you have to carry around a puke bag in your purse when you're hungover?
This bitch goes out driving during the nor'easter to get her ass eaten.. that’s dedication
I'm not big on drama but you need to put your pants on and leave.
Who did he bring home?
Idk. But did you see her shoe choice by the stairs, I'm really not expecting anything great.
I'm literally watching a webcam of the Vegas strip right now and it is making me sad.
Randomize
