Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(651): View more from Minnesota

Who do you think planted the wheat? Who do you think cleared the land and killed off the native inhabitants? Women?

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(225): View more from Louisiana

He came on my face and tried to draw out a smiley face because he said I looked like I had a bad day

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(267): View more from Pennsylvania

like why cant he just admit that he still wants to fuck me even though im underage

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(940): View more from Texas

Well, ive pounded a baby into a stripper and a girl who was on jerry springer, a 16 year old is logically next.

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(647): View more from Ontario

You broke out your mechano set and told us you were gonna "build us a beer machine" and 5 min later you were fast asleep

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(713): View more from Texas

I dont think he stole the pillow. I mean if he wanted a souvenir, my thong was on the nightstand.

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(770): View more from Georgia

The fact that he is from Canada is way more embarrassing than the fact that you met him on match.com

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(309): View more from Illinois

It takes a special friend to go vibrator shopping with

(847): View more from Illinois

Yes. It does.

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(904): View more from Florida

so let me get this straight you just stared at his boner all night?

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