Should I hook up with a slut its your call
Yes. Wrap it. If you dont have a condom do it anyway. YOU ONLY LIVE ONCE.
woke up naked, gf gone. There is a cup of change in the fridge, a bird in the bathroom, and odie is drawn on my ceiling. I live in a non sequitur
I'm on the strip, it's like a mini new years eve. Some girl just got taken away on a stretcher with her meter margarita in her hand claiming it's trophy for being awesome. Damn tourists are lightweights.
he ran me a hot bath. i thought i was in a pot and was going to be eaten. i was strangely ok with this
Oh eartly, In cocy youtu youchv make the wallflowers d tskunks!y, couch protection now,.sryou should feel special !
He looks like he's going to feed me a taco and then stab me. It's probably a good idea he's a lawyer
New year means new boundaries for the Brazilian lady.. I'm pretty sure I got wax on my asshole
the only thing you said was do the helicopter dick
How does a law student 15 days away from graduation prepare for a pass fail final? Drinking beer, eating thick cut bacon, and watching game of thrones, that's how
And my coffee table looks like something out of Scarface
I climbed through his window to find him already with another booty call. This wouldn't have happened if I could upgrade from my 7th grade scooter to a real car.
…If I were you I wouldn't use that as part of your argument to your dad for a car
The girl in line in front of me at the grocery store is buying wine, m&m minis, a toothbrush, and condoms. Is it inappropriate to high-five her?
Well I mean I HAD done a pretty good job of not pooping myself through the years
you ate an entire watermelon by using a CD as a spoon, then proceeded to chuck the leftovers at some dudes car...
All she said was "Do me by Friday."
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