do you remember how we all fit in that bathtub?
tequila
last night i got mauled by 2 gay men who were trying to make each other jealous by making the other think they could swing back- you're going to love atl
I had total buyers remorse when i finally got him naked. All that effort for a dude that hairy? Come on.
who's fault is it that she tells me today she is only 16 because i definately met her at the bar...
the only good thing about these hospital visits are the free pregnancy tests
After giving the pizza guy directions you told him to look for the big stupid looking kid outside in purple
It was also my first failed attempt at shower sex.
There's gotta be a happy medium between the guys who only want to sleep with me and the ones that respect me too much to try to sleep with me.
please tell me why my pillow is wearing your thong...
...i wondered where i left that...
So in Aca Taco on grad night 1am, this bitch walks in alone drunk as fuck in her gown to the front of the line and says, "I graduated today...thank YOU"
New hot neighbor boys moving in across from us...So i did the logical thing and bought two 30 packs up the hill and walked right by em. Consider the line hooked and ready to reel.
Sarah's knitting me a hat as an apology for unknowingly making out with my boyfriend
I love it when he cheats on me with nice people
Good news y'all just straight up snorted 2 adderall and I'm not a real being on this plane of existence anymore and I'm ready for finals
Can I get high for this class every tuesday? Its like a multi-sensory carnival acid trip.
So he has moved up to a stage 5 clinger...Surprised he didn't try to lure you into bed with tacos, like he did last time
Yeah... akward. I don't want a round 2
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