He disabled his match.com account in front of me
then he said "your boobs looked so much bigger on girls gone wild"
I forgot about that,good spring break.
Sex and the city 2 and twilight getting released in the same month. God hates mankind.
All I remember is saying that "fire will make it all better"
At least he's not married... I hate Halloween hookups
speaking of graduation plans, i'm blacked out eating sausage
Confirmed. Vegetarians give terrible head.
I didn't realize how drunk I was until my vagina was in the snow.
We had sex during an intermission, then the second period. The bruins better win. Missing a period isn't worth having sex with him
Saying someone's good at giving head is like saying someone is good at pouring juice like there is that one girl who will spill it everywhere but for the most part it's not that hard to be good at
He literally stole all the change that was on my floor and ran away while I was peeing. I have to rethink my standards.
He looks like a Mormon from a lifetime movie. Oddly I wanna give him a hand job
Oh god...Did I just fuck a sugar granddaddy?!
I'm peeing on your house...you up?
Aww you are cute. With your penis. And failures.
Randomize
