1:57 a.m. Where did you go???
1:58 a.m. What are you doing? I want to go home with you, why aren't you responding?
2:11 a.m. Heading back to your place now, will you let me in?
new number. flushed my phone last night when i puked, made B help me look for it for 2 hours.
home. puking in laundry basket.
If lil wayne asked you to lick him like a lollipop I feel that you would willingly oblige.
Unfortunately I think I would lick most anyone's lollipop.
It's your form of community service; servicing the greater SDSU area.
I'm so hungover I took Dramamine to help prevent the motion sickness of walking.
I fucked him in a hamburger. literally. he has a hamburger bed.
I just asked the dr if it was herpes while wearing my shirt from the strip club...
I told you to stay away from the strippers in Oklahoma
All i remember is people cheering me on to drink faster than the dog, out of the dog's bowl. I just couldn't stop.
He's asking if he can send a dick pic. How do I politely decline that?
Just managed to stab myself in the ass with a fork. I feel that as my best friend, I'm obligated by friend code to inform you of that sort of thing.
I can't stop drooling did you spike my drink?
Just try not to burn your pubes off with sparklers this year.
No promises
I just got his Save the Dave and, to answer your next question, NO I AM NOT GOING TO THE WEDDING OF THE GUY WHO GOT DRUNK AND CAME ON MY CHEST.
Seriously, I really just burned my nipple making ravioli.. I'd explain, but no reasoning makes this acceptable:/
I like to make sure they know it's casual by giving then a high five after sex
Randomize
