I got everything I ever gave her back, every picture, and money for the dog. I didn't want it she brought it all back and gave it to me. clothes jackets, pictures, dried flowers, ear rings, necklace...
Sell it on ebay and let's go to the bar
SEEEEXXX PLEASE
big game today.. looking forward to seeing that magic win, and then i will celebrate with a nude dip in lake Eola.. anyone else in??
I wish I had more reasons to start sentences with the phrase, "Here's the thing you've got to remember about cougars ...
there should be a relationship option on facebook "stillllll in a relationship"
Lesbian chick is doing her presentation on the time she woke up on the dockside still drunk at 7 am. This is why I show up to chinese class.
it was like i was on a global safari of uncircumcised men
You gave the cab driver your pants as collateral while you ran in the house for money.
Travelers Top-Tip: Europeans do not appreciate being repeatedly referred to as "gypsy" regardless of how good your Borat impression is.
It was darkish out, I was shit faced, and they should have marked the electric fence a little more clearly. The entire wedding reception saw me run full force into it
That super awesome moment when the guy who threw up in your bed last night crawls into your roommate's bed the next morning...Naked...She was in it.
You can laugh all you want but 99 grapes is a lot stronger than what you were drinking.
last night on the strip the guy screamed at you YOU GOTTA WORK ON YOUR CALVES.
Really need a jack off emoji
Who do we write to about that?
There was puke outside of my classroom and lecture was half empty. Damn thirsty thursday is intense
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