Will you Wikipedia Vin Diesel? Is he gay? It's important...
my roommate and her friend got reaallllly high last night and it looks like they played scrabble. one of their words is "nippal"
She ordered a salad and a budweiser. I love her.
He then proceeded to tell me about his enlarged lymph nodes, his"severe" case of blue balls.
I have bruises on my ass from her spurs. God bless Texas.
Would it be sharing too much to tell you that my nipples hurt so much that I couldn't comfortably go down the stairs?
Can we make a sex game out of monopoly somehow?
Using our apartments online floor/space planner to see how many beer pong tables we can fit. Dont think they had this in mind when they put this thing online.
Probably not lol but were fitting as many as possible
Drinking Fireball means never having to say you're sorry. Unless its at you're arraignment.
I'm ready to sell my soul to the strip club tonight
So "I hate myself Mondays" has extended to Tuesday this week. I just had peanut butter and a glass of wine for lunch.
There were containers of weed in the piñata. How much more Colorado does it get
fuck sobriety. I want to wake up tomorrow in a park or some shit.
I don't know if I'm dying or this is just a mild inconvenience
Just sold my panties for 40 bucks to some rando dude at the gay bar. I think I found a way to fund next years spring break trip. Hello cancun!
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