Greg found me on xtube. Who knew random hook ups would leave their web cams on and upload it. At least it shows off big penis.
perhaps when you are drinking red wine from a tall glass with a straw it is time to call it a night.
I'm having a terrible night. Can I sleep over?
Too tired to pretend that I care : (
I just saw fred flintstone in my fruity pebbles!
what drugs are you on?
none, cept for the pain medication i got prescribed by the doc: it said 2 pills every 3 hours, but I took 6 cuz i'll be away from home later
i threw up on the blunt... he was pissed.
I can't wait until weight watchers comes out with a beer
our landlord thinks we're weird & alcoholics. he came in to fix our broken tub and saw the laundry door on our table for beer pong, the garbage bag full of empty fifths, and that one armed baby on the doorstep. plus he saw us swimming and yargging in our pirate pool that one time.
You're always adorable, but when you're drunk, you're like Chia Pet adorable.
Man, the last time I saw you you were giving me a thumbs up while being pulled out the bar by your belt from some girl.
she was in the bathroom washing her eye makeup off with hand sanitizer.
Also I have uncooked pasta. I was hoping that could get cooked at your place. Don't ask about the circumstances that I came into ownership of uncooked pasta
Its official vodka lemonade jager and whiskey with coorslight is a bad combination of try to forget the work week cocktail ps bring alkaseltzer
The original plan involved fireworks and a lot more dildos but the new one is still okay.
Wore a burger king crown while giving head still drunk this morning #blessed
At least you didn't lose your virginity to chumbawumba
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