belinda wants 2 know wr u got ur butt pads
i dont wear butt pads that thang is au naturel
Yeah...right...LMAO
god I wish I could record you sometimes, you're so neurotic
Disadvantage of being gay..... my gag reflexes makes trying to make myself throw up extremely difficult.
Now there's vomit covered trash all over the front lawn. I feel accomplished
She was surprised when she saw all our living room furniture was made from old kegs. It's like she's never met us before...
We should live in a duplex and just hook up with randoms for the rest of forever and be animal hoarders.
Remind me again why sleeping with a coworker and his wife would be a terrible idea.
I was just reelected president of justgotlaidsylvania
I'm going to pound you from behind over a table at the bar while I pull your hair and call you a whore...please pass along that message to Rob
Think I just subconsciously wanted a cigarette and started sleep walking to Carl's.. Didn't realize what I was doing until I found myself in an elevator.
You were, but he disappeared after you said you wanted him to get you pregnant so you'd have a child by the time the Boy Meets World sequel starts
Shroomed with my best friend'a dad at his wife's surprise birthday party so you can say I have experience in the field
I almost wanna stick a tampon in and sneeze bent over to see if it actually shoots out
idk how I feel so profoundly understood by someone whose latest tweet is "labia majora's mask." but I do.
I think I'll shower sitting down. That seems safe.
Randomize
