theyre doing shots to celebrate her boob jobs anniversary.
AHHHH!!! note to self never google image chastity belt omfg
I was too high to figure out which of the three doors would lead me to my classroom, so i sat down in the middle of the hallway and ate a twinkie.
blowing a .13 at 10 AM isn't nearly as cool as I thought it would be.
my advisor is telling us the best way to sneak in alcohol on move in day. I definately picked the right college
does it count as a threesome if she tried to blow the dude who was passed out next to us?
deryk tried to steal your screen door and i think sam and brent are duct taping lauren to the diving board.
I took my exam the next day still drunk and failed, but I kno for a fact that I filled in the bubbles for my name perfectly
Hypothetical Question: Would you take a cougar bullet for me?
SOMEONE WITH THE TWITTER HANDLE "METHLAB" FAVORITED THAT PICTURE
I'm studying. And by studying I mean I am laying on my floor drinking boones farm alone. Last two weeks. Fuck it.
Started my day with puking in a trash can.... Its gonna be a beautiful day
I'm only fucking women born in the 90s this summer
I told him I might be pregnant and he said he'd buy me a test and a twix bar. I'm marrying him. Tomorrow.
ONE DAY CAN WE PLEASE HAVE SECRET SEX. PREFERABLY IN AN ANCIENT PYRAMID BUT I'M NOT OPPOSED TO A 4 STAR HOTEL
Randomize
