No, you can still breathe under the balls.
I'm pretty sure we've had sex a bunch more times than we've hugged. So hugs are weird when they happen.
Thank God I did Vegas bombs with those cops at their Christmas party. We should so be in jail.
I got kicked out because I puked again I'm on the fire truck outside
i've really grown. sober me left an alarm for me every 10 minutes that said NO FAT CHICKS!
dude. im stealing that.
Went home drunk last night and peed on my Christmas tree, my mothers going to fucking kill me
Life for us students isn't all fun and drunken lesbian affairs you know
Well I let her practice her tattooing on me. This shaky dragon on my arm says Im getting laid.
I might have been the first person to be rolling balls at a referee seminar
On a better note: I'm on pace for 730 female produced orgasms in 2013.
They were arguing about who would hit the piñata first so naturally you tore it open with your hands. You broke the piñata and their hearts.
We literally solved our fight using cat pictures on Instagram. True love.
The only monogamous relationship I can keep is with my eyebrow lady...
Saw my drug dealer at Easter mass with his family so that was weird
I recall trading my iPhone watch for a carton of Marlboros.
Randomize
