i just learned how to squirt via google. life is good.
Ask politely.
Fine. Can i please come over, hang out with you, sit around a campfire, smoke tree, listen to sublime, and fuck the shit out of you?
Thats good enough.
My present? It was a fake boarding pass he made in Photoshop. He litterally just gave me a one way ticket to Pound Town
Srsly this has gone to far. Just broke my nose on the toilet. College bars.
You can come over, sure. But I'll be watching college hockey during the blow job.
At what point do you think my baptist preacher of a father will clue in that my brother "bringing a foreign exchange student" for thanksgiving means "bringing his european boyfriend and they'll probably fuck every night" for thanksgiving?
I'm going to fix your towel rack. I broke it while I was dancing on it.
Is it possible to sluttify a hobbit costume? Cause if so, this will be my biggest accomplishment.
Just so were clear your wife is cut off from my dick.
I would say don't do anything I wouldn't do, but we both know I forget about my personal safely when getting laid is on the line
See that doesn't work because we've had sex so its awkward for you to call me mom
well i blew him then my wife blew him, so im guessing we'll be seeing him around, yeah
I covered the puke with a shingle there's not many chunks. I think it will blend quickly.
my night went from a boring school play to hotboxing a car with 3 criminals
I’m making a jello mold of my penis
Will it be as disappointing as your actual penis?
Randomize
